Fuck, I havent done this in almost 3 months! Anyway
Firstly the same one as ever. I do the 2 minute walk to the van (no sandwiches today). Come back, everyone looks at me with their best Walt Disney puppy eyes and say "You didnt say you were going, I would have had something..."
WELL WALK OVER THERE THEN. YOU CAN SEE IT FROM THE FUCKING WINDOW YOU SPASTIC.
But when I was over there there were a five guys from the local industrial estate obviously looking to impress by picking up burgers with their newly aquired opposable thumbs. Anyway they were having a conversation about the previous friday night which due to the fact they were bellowing I couldnt help but overhear. The gist... jist.. whatever of it was that the five of them had gone to the pub together straight from work and at about 11 had headed off on their seperate ways. Some had gone home, some had gone to different clubs to meet people. But weirdly ALL had pulled some "really fit bird" once they had. They all had their variation on "Well I was on the bus going home and there was this REALLY FIT BIRD so I thought fuck it and chatted her up and she came back to my place".
And after each little story the other four would do lots of "NICE ONE!" type back slapping. And I'm thinking... are any of them actually dumb enough to beleive it or is it some mutual "I'll pretend yours is real if you pretend mine is" thing? You know, maybe one of them did score some monster chick who is bored of working at Lidls and wants some easy child support money, but all five of them? Coincidentally when none of the others were there to see it?